Friday, May 25, 2007
Arrrr! Well, I jumped th' gun an' seen it las' e'en!
I could na wait!
Brilliant! An' I do na care WHAT th' buggery critics spake!
It were FULL o' moments o' intense Piratical Pride......obscure pirate reference........a Fellini-esque nature in parts...... an' singularly a true 'Comin' Home' o' Piracy!
I actually can na wait t' see it on DVD so I can pause an' replay......there were a lot goin' on.
As fer th' rest I'll be sayin' naught........jus' let's ye find oot fer yerselves!
I be no expert in style nor script....it were jus' like bein reunited wit' old friends once again......an' that were good enough fer me! I'll leave th' flaws t' th' critics.
Though, I mus' say I were greatly disappointed at th' lack o' "true" piracy displayed by th'
Attendees in this here landlocked town.
It appears that I must acquiesce t' th' bloody Historical Society.....they were right.....
there really Arrrrrrrr no pirates in Clay...........(I can feel their gloatin' now.......)
(I mean......who GOES t' a pirate movie an' does na cheer when Keith Richard's makes an' appearance.........nor "Arrrrr's!" when th' colors be hoisted in an' orgasmic moment o' victory....?
(Hey...I gets it where I can, ok?)
(An' since precedent has been set wit' th' last two movies.....WHO does na KNOW (nor CARE) aboot th' easter egg at th' end? They were teemin' oot o' th' theatre liken unto lemmings hell bent on takin' on th' cliff whilst me an' th' lonely four other pirates are yellin.....'but, wait!)
I were perplexed an' saddened an' found me life t' be void o' meanin'............but, that ain't really news now is it.....?)
Oh well, they can lead Foxmorton int' a piratical void.......but they can na make her shrink........
Th' manager at th' mall looked at me (in full regalia!) an' jus' appeared confused.
I almos' wanted t' buy a ticket t' Spiderman jus' t' throw him off some more......
He said he ne'er thought t' do "somethin' like that"...............
Hmm. Pirates at a Pirate Movie.......go figure.
When I give 'im me "Pirates fer Hire" business card he said he wished he had known.......
'course, it were then that I reminded 'im that were what he said LAST BLOODY YEAR when I told 'im th' same thing...............he said no matter...there be $1.50 upgrade an' ye can na bring that pistol inside here, neither. Next!
Though, on th' upside....I DID manage t' fluster th' kid behind th' counter int' chargin' me fer a small grog when I really got th' big one. That way I only had t' take oot a loan at 18% payable in fourteen monthly installments.....
Ah, piracy.....ain't it grande?
Lookin' forward t' hearin' yer views!
Oh, an' by th' by......you're right...I DON'T love you....
and yes, it DOES makes you look fat!
Fair Winds e'er an' always...........
Wednesday, May 23, 2007
Please pass along.....
Vendors welcome to contact event planner.
No fee for table.
Must be pirate/history related goods.
Chrissy Clancy (aka Foxmorton)
(315) 652-3800 ext 137
Arrrr! It's a Pirate's Life, Indeed!
Put on yer stripey socks and light the cannons....
as the Town of Clay presents
Tales from Remikreh
(of the famous Bill Johnston Days in Alexandria Bay!)
PIRATE DAY FESTIVAL 2007
SATURDAY JULY 21, 2007
LOCATED Town of Clay Historic site & Welcome Center
Route 31 Clay, NY 13041
(behind "Cigarville" railway station)
FOOD AVAILABLE by 'BAGELICIOUS' of Bayberry Plaza
A Free Family Event FEATURING:
SWORD & archaic weapon demonstrations
Tales from Remikreh skits & COMEDY
Games & Music
"FIGHT A PIRATE"
An exciting SWORD FIGHTING SHOWDOWN
as the Pirates take on the Town Guard in
a contest of skill and agility!
Come cheer on your favorites!
STREET PIRATE TROUPE
perform the stage play
"THE PYRATS of HAMELIN"
-Never has cheese smelled so bad!
original script & direction by chrissy clancy
Cap'n MiMI LILY ROSE FOXMORTON of the Bloomer Bloomer
(yes, she DID win thAT TALK LIKE A PIRATE DAY CONTEST
as a matter of fact......)
the RETURN of MAD MORTIMER!
Don't say we didn't warn ye!
The Chaotic Crew o' Street Pirates reunites!
contact: Foxmorton (Chrissy)
The wearing of PIRATE ATTIRE....PROPS......ACCESSORIES.
FLAGS....PEGLEGS....PARROTS & OTHER VARIOUS PIRATICAL GEAR
WE MAY NOT HAVE THOUGHT OF or mentioned....
QUITE FRANKLY, WE'D BE DISAPPOINTED IF YE DIDN'T!...
and don't come cryin' to us if ye gets there and DIDN'T... THEN wishes ye had....
we're jus' sayin'......
Friday, May 18, 2007
Meself, Maggie Pricklebottom & Saltina Morgan arrrrr proud t' say we gave
our blooood in helpin' t' Free th' Pirates!
(An' we ain't sorry t' see our names up on th' big screen neither!
We figger we got as much time as that there dog in th' easter egg end scene o' PotC II........we're good wit' that.)
So, go t'......
an' see our glorious monikers!
Ye knows us....ana-thin' fer a credit.
(Ye can also watch fer us as 'extras' in DON JUAN and MIGUEL's new movie due oot...well....sooner or later. We be wenches # 112, 113 & 114 respectively......or somethin' o' that nature. Do na blink! Th' indie movie be called THE ADVENTURES OF DON JUAN AND MIGUEL:
an' what used t' be called THE HUMP OF DESTINY but is now called BERNARD, I think, but I wish it were still called THoD because it would have been really cool to tell people that. Ye can follow the production at http://www.donjuanandmiguel.blogspot.com an' figure it oot because we do na really know ana-thin' aboot it....we jus' showed up an' did what we were told. But support it ana-way as they are neat an' talented guys....an' more importantly...they let us be in their movie.)
Fer th' record though....I got t' be a 'stander" an' a "mover" whilst Mags an' Saltina only got t' be
"sitters" an' "stayers". I ain't gloatin'.....jus' pointin' oot a fact. (insert innocent face here)
So......that be our story.
Ain't th' Pirate Life grande?!
ps. An' do na give me grief that th' addresses ain't clickable.....I could na figure it oot. ~f.
Saturday, May 12, 2007
Me inner pirate?
Hmm. Me OUTER pirate, too!
Some men are born great, some achieve greatness and some slit the throats of any man that stands between them and the mantle of power. You never met a man you couldn't eviscerate. Not that mindless violence is the only avenue open to you - but why take an avenue when you have complete freeway access? You are the definitive Man of Action. You are James Bond in a blousy shirt and drawstring-fly pants. Your swash was buckled long ago and you have never been so sure of anything in your life as in your ability to bend everyone to your will. You will call anyone out and cut off their head if they show any sign of taking you on or backing down. You cannot be saddled with tedious underlings, but if one of your lieutenants shows an overly developed sense of ambition he may find more suitable accommodations in Davy Jones' locker. That is, of course, IF you notice him. You tend to be self absorbed - a weakness that may keep you from seeing enemies where they are and imagining them where they are not.
What's Yer Inner Pirate?
brought to you by The Official Talk Like A Pirate Web Site. Arrrrr!