THE MAD PIRATE HATTER

FOXMORTON'S CHAPEAU ADVENTURE: PART 2

(pic hat #3)



I learned a lot of things this summer.


For instance I learned that if you put an "x" at the end of a French word it makes it plural. ie: Chapeaux = more than 1 hat.
And since that's what I'm ending up with plus I'm too lazy to go back through all the blogs to change it I just promise that I'll get it right starting now. ;)


I learned that I have absolutely no concept of size as is evidenced by the way my hats seem to be getting progressively smaller as the brocade gets more expensive. But mayhap I'm just really stingy or terribly afraid. LOL


I learned that my granddaughter's head can be best covered by using the following measurements: My mother's castle platter x the matching soup bowl + my least favorite wooden salad bowl - two inches.


I totally made up that formula but those items are what I used to make the first pattern.


I learned that having a 38 pound abdominal tumor and being stuck at home makes you forget some things and remember a whole lot of others. Like the stuff that really matters.....family, friends, creativity and what will be important to me from now on.


I learned that I'm sorry to those of you I disappointed when I said in my last blog I was "shackled inside my home" and you though I was on house arrest. ;)


I learned that when you come home from the store and find a still icy Duncan Donuts iced berry-berry coffee on your front steps made exactly the way you love it (three Splendas & cream) with a thoughtful, still-wrapped, extra large straw beside it that you feel happy and sad all at the same time.


I learned that my daughter loves me enough to cater to my every insane whim without batting an eye or questioning my obsessive-compulsive requests and to be there every blessed second I wanted something. And I can't imagine any of it was easy.


I learned that my 14 year old granddaughter is capable of staying in my house for a week and ne'er moving a single thing out of place and still loving me when I returned home and said: "Can you pick up the dog poop before you go?"
(Of all people my friend Merlyn will appreciate the impossibility of this task!) ;)


I learned that my big dog snuggled next to me when I wake up in the middle of the night makes the pain go away better than another pill.


I learned that I have friends I didn't even realize I had.......friends I don't begin to appreciate enough.....friends who I'll adore forever......and friends I though I had....but didn't........


I learned that making hats makes me feel silly and good about myself and that creativity,
like big dogs, daughters and kindred friends has the power to heal.


So, much like getting my French plurals in the correct place I can't go back and change anything
about my life....I just promise I'll get it (more) right starting now.


Fair Winds and a followin' sea........
~Foxmorton

CHAPEAU #2

CHAPEAU #2
The Wee Hat

FOXMORTON'S CHAPEAUX ADVENTURE

Foxmorton's Chapeaux Adventure

Being the Summer of Naught for me for reasons that require a blog of their own I'm finding that being shackled inside my home for the summer has afforded me the opportunity to create 'till my heart's content. And that's a very good thing.


Early morning coffee on the sunny deck, pencil and notebook in hand, I've done more writing under less stress than I've ever done before in my life. I've nowhere to be and absolutely zero responsibilities other than keeping my self washed, fed and alive. Rather a blessing in disguise and I don't intend to waste a single, glorious moment.


But with days that stretch to the next bowl of blueberries or afternoon nap with the dog one finds that reading and writing, delicious as they are, will only fill up so much time and space and so one begins to search for something just a wee bit more creative to do. And so, in a fanciful burst I decided to make hats.


Do I know how to make a hat? No.
Do I ever use a sewing machine? Nope.
Do I have the slightest clue as to how to begin, much less finish, a hat? Nay.


And why should that stop me?


Googled about and came upon a site that pretty much reflected my way of thinking: (and here I paraphrase) 'I don't know what I'm doing and certainly not by millenary standards so please don't tell them I said this because none of what I'm about to tell you is actually correct by the professionals and they get touchy about that but here's the basics of what you need to know, now.........(and here's the part that stuck with me)....
"GO FORTH AND MAKE HATS!"


How absolutely beautiful is that?


Go forth and make hats.


You don't need to know what you're doing.....just go forth and make hats.


And so I did.


Hauled out some old brocade I didn't mind sacrificing and went at it. Started small (baby sized) just to see if I could do it and I ended up with THE wee-est, most perfect hat! I amazed myself.


And it's all done by hand (as I eschew machines of any kind). I'm not saying it looks like how I envisioned when I started-it sort of evolved as I went along-but as it grew into a chapeaux shape I was just so proud! It's quite jaunty if I do say so myself! I think I've a knack fer it.


And it's rather like me this summer.....not the shape I envisioned but evolving into something rather wee and yet grand all at the same time.


Of course now I'm fabric obsessed and can't wait to make many, many more and elaborate non-baby sized hats but hey, a wee bit of Chapeaux Therapy ne'er hurt a soul.


So bottom line.......I've staved off psychosis for another few days and save me your unwanted brocade scraps. (please)


Fair Winds......and remember...... take time to create.........
xox
~Foxmorton

THE OWL and the PUSSYCAT WENT TO SEA

It's days like these, remembering my favorite poetry, that I wish I were a more accomplished visual artist.......but on the plus side, I do own a wondrous runcible spoon!

The Owl and the Pussycat
by Edward Lear

The Owl and the Pussycat went to sea
In a beautiful pea-green boat,
They took some honey, and plenty of money,
Wrapped up in a five pound note.
The Owl looked up to the stars above,
And sang to a small guitar,
"O lovely Pussy! O Pussy, my love,
What a beautiful Pussy you are, you are, you are,
What a beautiful Pussy you are."
Pussy said to the Owl "You elegant fowl,
How charmingly sweet you sing.
O let us be married, too long we have tarried;
But what shall we do for a ring?"
They sailed away, for a year and a day,
To the land where the Bong-tree grows,
And there in a wood a Piggy-wig stood
With a ring at the end of his nose, his nose, his nose,
With a ring at the end of his nose.
"Dear Pig, are you willing to sell for one shilling your ring?"
Said the Piggy, "I will"
So they took it away, and were married next day
By the Turkey who lives on the hill.
They dined on mince, and slices of quince,
Which they ate with a runcible spoon.
And hand in hand, on the edge of the sand.
They danced by the light of the moon, the moon, the moon,
They danced by the light of the moon.